So DAY 2 & 3 WENT BY AS A HAZE!
Every day more rules, more structure and more boundaries to help my little man process his information.
All I remember saying was:
"Read the instructions on the Teacher Schedule First. Read all the Messages on the Team Chats next. Watch all the Movies and Content before you start, they relate to your work, but find them first. Read everything before. Swim around by yourself between all the messages 30 min before starting time, just read everything. Read Slowly but Read Everything. When you see starting times, meeting times and deadline times, write them in your diary immediately. Say to yourself what do I need to get this done.... Tell yourself everything is for a mark and your report, so do it well and submit quality.
It all seems sooooo overwhelming, even still now.
AND DON'T START UNTIL YOU CAN DO ONE SUBJECT AT A TIME with your head saying:
STAY ON TASK, ONE THING AT A TIME AND GET IT DONE.
For 3 days I felt myself saying: Don't look at that NOW! Why are you getting involved in everyone's discussions, just leave them! Don't answer that, you not doing that subject right NOW! Stay on Task, you working on this at the moment! Don't look at your phone, put it away! Why you checking something else! Sit down! Leave the putty now! Stop clicking the pens! Stop helping others! We not starting that until this is completely done! Why you trying to call X if he is not in the meeting, its not your job!
OBVIOUS AS HELL FOR OTHERS, BUT NOT FOR OUR ADHD.
It was, and is still so difficult. He is what he is, highly DISTRACTED AND IMPULSIVE, we've accepted that years ago.
But so was Albert Einstein, Walt Disney, Richard Branson and John F Kennedy, a few hero's to name just a few......... It's not Corona for goodness sake, nobody ever died from ADHD! It is OK, we count our blessings.
For me, it was also unbelievable to witness how inconsiderate and oblivious others parents are as to their kids online spaces.
I watched the online classes for a few days: open cupboards, clothes falling out the wardrobes, dogs barking, domestics walking past the back of kids, siblings running behind, some shrieking on the top of their voices, dogs on kids laps, even a vacuum cleaner!!!
I have House Hunted and witnessed peoples homes, their photo frames, their messy studies, their paintings, their furniture, their untidy bookshelves - damn, have you ever considered all these background things are distracting for our ADHD kids?
Switch off your cameras if you don't need them, we do not need to see peoples homes, the ADHD simply can't manage with them. It is super super distracting for ours?
I watched him watch the screen for 10 minutes while all the other kids were debating whether or not they had the link for the audio to do the work..... I watched him as he stared at the screen...... I watched him do nothing....... I waited for a reaction, but saw nothing.....eventually I whispered some processing KEY WORDS "do YOU have what they all looking for??? It finally moved his dopamine receptors! HE SUDDENLY JUMPED!!!
I witnessed his noisy "seeking movement hand toys" clicking like crazy to find worksheets all over the tabs: each subject, every day in a different place. Each time his hands moved like the panic mechanic clicking that mouse like a high speed train.
If putty moving was a Sport he would get the gold medal . I watched that poor putty get strangled, twisted and pulled at Olympic speed today.
I witnessed kids saying "I cant see, I can see, Who is that, Who is talking" no less than 20 times in various high pitched voices within one class..... Because our boy has poor vision, his flapper ears hear sound 10 times the volume of others so can you imagine what’s coming into his loudspeaker while this is all going down? It can be so highly distracting for some, our ADHD?
I hear instructions like "spread your work across the week and do a little every day"...... Lets be honest, its tough for ours to follow today's instructions clearly without being impulsive or distracted. We simply can’t plan 3-4 days in advance right now, we not there YET. Please make it easy for our ADHD, we are even marking now too!
We can’t assume these young kids are actually computer literate either? My extremely "tech savy" son (he really is) is even struggling to find the alphabet keys fast enough now....... Typing Taboo might be a useful option to consider too....
It is clearly a learning curve for everyone, including all our BOOMERS who have done so well in such a short time. THAT IS OK, THAT IS UNDERSTOOD, THAT IS TOTALLY NORMAL but just remember we have kids out there with many different requirements and many different ways to learn and it may just be one step forward, 2 steps backwards for a while...... It certainly isn’t fair to judge or mark their books right now until the scores are equal. Time will heal to make the playing fields fair, our ADHD are on their way....
We are not different, we are super smart, we just learn differently...... let me put this into perspective, its the way I began to understand ADHD: to get to the Supermarket, you can go different routes: most take the popular highway, some take the internal road and a few take the side roads (ours) - BUT THEY ALL GET THERE, TO THE SAME PLACE IN THE END, JUST A DIFFERENT ROUTE! Some take the vehicle, some walk, some use a bicycle, some Uber - ALL DIFFERENT BUT THE SAME IN THE END! JUST A DIFFERENT SPEED!
The same for the ADHD.
So to those who are not exposed and don't know too much about US - just be mindful and considerate, we are all the same but different! We process WELL but our journey is different.
He turns to me and says: "I,m
starting to get bored" - I,m thankful that the lesson is over and there can be no more time to be distracted, we JUST made it!
Today is Friday, we are safe through the first 5 days. Luckily, there is still no Alcohol for sale during the Lockdown! I havent smoked in 7 years, but this week had there been cigarettes for sale, my nicotine addiction just might have returned..... So I,m really thankful for Corona right now!
Every day has definitely become and will become easier, we cant allow him to use "his trump card" to get ANY special treatment. We just simply need that "Different Tool Box".
Sorry my boy, you just have to slot in, pull out some grit and deal with this. Just do your best, because your Mental Health is more important right now while this Corona hangs on all of our heads.....
Win or Loose this online schooling thang, either way, I know you will be like Richard Branson too!!!!! #yourbiggestbeliever #ILOVEU
GOODLUCK TO EVERYONE OUT THERE DEALING WITH THEIR OWN, xxx